Oriel College Oxford

34 days ago

Very Silly Andrew Monk issues piss poor numbers and makes howling schoolboy accounting error

Maybe the Andrew Monk Christmas carol was not the egomaniac’s biggest Yuletide Nightmare. Now, as an Aquis advisor, he faces the humiliation of having to reissue (piss poor) interims after making a howling schoolboy error. I guess they did not teach accounting for beginners at Oriel College Oxford. Let’s start with the schoolboy error.

105 days ago

Andrew Monk’s next humiliating blow-up: Caracal warns of share suspension on November 1, it should be suspended NOW

Oh dear, oh dear. Life was so much easier for Andrew Monk when he was getting a lower second in name dropping at Oriel College Oxford. Yesterday afternoon came grim news from Caracal Gold (GCAT): PKF LittleJohn will not be signing off on it annual accounts on time so the shares will be suspended on November 1. The real issue is why they are not suspended already “pending clarification.”

147 days ago

Silverwood Brands – More Monkey business as a third of the VSA tangible balance sheet is now suspended

Oh dear, oh dear. Its more bad news for we loyal – or in my case unwitting – shareholders in VSA Capital ( Very Sexy Andrew) run by the egomaniac graduate of Oriel College Oxford (lower second in name dropping), Mr Andrew Monk. More than a third of our balance sheet is now tied up in shares which are now suspended for a reason that just does not wash. Oh dear, oh dear.

163 days ago

Andrew Monk’s latest disgrace: Cook’s Coffee subsidiary Triple Two going bust

Now I really am ashamed to be the unwitting owner of £120 worth of shares in VSA Capital (Very Sexy Andrew), the broker and financial adviser run by egomaniac Andrew Monk, a man – as he mentions daily – educated at Oriel College Oxford. In November of last year VSA racked up a big corporate fee getting an Aquis dual listing for New Zealand listed coffee chain Cooks Coffee (COOK). Cook’s was – as I showed here – insolvent at the time and VSA’s forecasts to get the IPO away were a disgrace.

163 days ago

Invinity – More Monkey Business: when is the next placing Andrew you dissembling scoundrel?

You may remember that a few weeks ago Andrew Monk got pretty furious when I suggested that he was taking Invinity Energy (IES) to see a stack of Canadian fund managers to lay the groundwork for the next bailout placing. Today we have interims and it is blindingly obvious that as part of his degree in name dropping at Oriel College Oxford, Monkey did not do any maths but he might have done a paper on misleading investors. Natch Invinity boasts of “record” sales and muppet investors seem impressed by that ignoring the company’s own admission today that it is running out of money.

169 days ago

Caracal Gold – RNS Needed

Obviously, when your adviser spends most of his time playing golf or practicing the name dropping he learned from his time at Oriel College Oxford, you may not be reminded of your obligations to keep investors informed about your financial position. Perhaps that is why Caracal Gold (GCAT) did not bother telling investors last year that it had taken out a death spiral for almost five months. Or that loan finance it had said it had secured had not arrived.

185 days ago

UPDATED: A slur and a shocking revelation from Andrew Monk of VSA, this is so embarrassing

As you may have seen on twitter, Mr Andrew Monk is on a no expenses spared trip to Vancouver to tell folks there several times a day that he went to Oriel College Oxford where he got an upper second in name dropping. Actually, he is there taking Invinity (IES) round fund managers on a ramping trip. Now he has taken to twitter with a slur and a monstrous revelation.

373 days ago

KPMG and an ex partner already put out to pasture get another pointless FRC fine and nobody cares: it's sham justice

Your starter for 10: How long, before today, is it since KPMG was last reprimanded and fined by the FRC? Monk (Oriel College Oxford): Eight days! Correct! You now have three questions for five points each on lies told by Caracal Gold (GCAT). Today’s fine for KPMG is, of course totally meaningless but relates to the audit of The Works.co.uk (WRKS) for the year end 26 April 2020. KPMG really fucked up here and to reduce the fine admitted so very quickly.

373 days ago

Andrew Monk is taking the piss – Caracal Gold and its “Corporate Governance Review”

After the resignation of PR adviser St Brides which refused to put its name to any more disingenuous RNS releases, it must by Andrew Monk’s VSA Capital (VSA) that takes the blame for crafting the quite delusional statements issued by Caracal Gold (GCAT). Monk may have been educated at Oriel College Oxford, as he reminds us on an almost daily basis, but where did he learn to talk such cock?

399 days ago

Tom Winnifrith Bearcast: there are worse hobbies than raising a quarter of a million quid for a great cause like Woodlarks

But reader Magna Carta says that you all want me to stop mentioning what he terms my “hobby”. Matthew’s Dog and Catriona will be delighted that I think he can go feck himself, please do feel free to donate HERE. Nearly all of the podcast , as ever, is about companies and I cover: Inland Homes (INL), Moonpig (MOON), Caracal Gold (GCAT), VSA Capital (VSA) and its revenue recognition and the odd company that is Kelso (KLSO). PS did you know that Andrew Monk who runs, what he terms, Very Sexy Andrew, went to Oriel College Oxford? He does mention it now and again.

408 days ago

Tom Winnifrith Bearcast: six little small cap piggies

I end with a discussion about myself, Andrew Bell, his imaginary marathon running g/f and Cheryl - please donate to Rogue Bloggers for Woodlarks HERE. Before that I look at six piggies filling me with despair, are there no rules or basic morals at all any more: Braveheart (BRH), Nanoco (NANO), Caracal Gold (GCAT), Wildcat Petroleum (WCAT), ScotGold (SGZ) and Andrew Monk’s VSA Capital (VSA). Has Andrew told anyone today that he went to Oriel College Oxford?

411 days ago

BREAKING: The £216.8m Lush scandal: Silverwood Brands – advised by Andrew Monk’s VSA Capital: has it twice breached the Companies Act

The FCA and Aquis Regulation are already investigating this scandal and so, with a hat Tip to in-house BB genius PL, I post the question as to whether on two counts, VSA Capital’s (VSA) star client Silverwood Brands (SLWD) has twice breached the Companies Act. If it has, surely VSA’s CEO Andrew “have I mentioned that I went to Oriel College Oxford, Monk needs to issue a profits warning.

412 days ago

Another Question for Andrew Monk about the £216.8 million Silverwood deal now under FCA scrutiny

Smug stockbroker Andrew Monk has, probably, today already several folks about his education at Oriel College Oxford but is yet to respond to the issue of him misleading the market with regard to revenue recognition re Silverwood Brands (SLWD) so here is another question for the Monkey.

418 days ago

Letter to Aquis Regulation re Andrew Monk and VSA Capital – misleading trading statement?

Not only does Andrew Monk and VSA Capital list shitcos on the Aquis Lobster Pot but VSA itself is listed on Aquis too. It listed at 21p on 9 September 2021. Its shares are 49% down so far this year and can now be sold for just 10p. But has the Monkey legged over investors with a misleading trading statement. I think the graduate of Oriel College Oxford (has he told us about his posh education yet today?) has and have written to Aquis Regulation suggesting it force VSA to clarify.